Skipper: Commence adorable high-jinks now! Go, go go! Kowalski: Executing waddling with strange yet oddly-endearing body shakes. Private: Pretending to lose my balance and face-plant into the pool now. Skipper: I got belly sliding duty. Let's make it extra cute and cuddly today, boys.
Skipper: How's the catch of the day, men? Private: Looks fishy, Skipper. Skipper: Fish are supposed to look fishy. Kowalski: No, I think he means "fishy". Skipper: Good "fishy" or bad "fishy"? Private: [Shows Skipper the fish-shaped soy cakes] Definitely bad "fishy".
Rico: [Weakly] Fish... fish! Kowalski: 67 hours without the succulent, salty tang of the sea. [Rico's eye is bloodshot] He can't take much more. Skipper: [with determination on his face] Neither can I.
Skipper: I want confirmation that there is food in that truck. [Private and Rico are inside a K-9 unit truck] Private: Affirmative, but it looks like the food is us!
Kowalski: This is Wiener One. Are we aborting mission? Repeat, are we aborting mission? Skipper: Gentlemen, we are penguins. We have a natural need to feed on the fruits of the sea. That's the way Mama Nature built us. Now who wants to spit in the eye of Mama Nature? [No one speaks] That's what I thought. We are go for operation!
Skipper: Kowalski, adorability readings. Kowalski: The readings show that the audience's adulation for our adorable antics is reaching optimum levels. Skipper: Then hit them with the tail wags. No mercy! [Penguins wag tails, audience aw] Skipper: And cease tail wagging now! Always leave them wanting more.
Private: (after getting crates full of fish) We have enough fish to last forever! Rico: (happy) Fish! Fish! (opera voice) FIIIIIIIIIISH!
END OF ARTICLE